


Marry Me

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Angst, Drama, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 10:07:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/797144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Will Blair settle down?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Marry Me

## Marry Me

#### by blairbear

  
We're just playing. I'll put them back when we're done - I promise.  
Thanx to Annie who makes it better.  
None.  
This story is a sequel to: None

* * *

Marry Me  
By: blairbear 

"Mmmm," said Blair, as he held onto Jim's arm that was wrapped around his waist. "This is the best way to wake up." 

They'd had a slow and sensual love-making session lasting into the early hours of the morning, and the two were still well sated. 

"I couldn't agree with you more," replied Jim as he kissed his way from Blair's neck to his shoulder and back. "What should we do with the next five days?" 

Simon had rewarded the team with five days of downtime, for they had the best solve ratio in the county. It was something that the Mayor had used as an incentive to the detective division of the Cascade Police Department. 

"Let's go fishing. We can ask Simon if we can borrow his cabin." 

"Yeah! It would be a perfect time. Just after the first big snow melt. Days are getting warmer..." Blair continued. 

"Sounds perfect. I'm sure Simon won't have a problem with us using the cabin. You stay here and go back to sleep, and I'll give Simon a call." 

With that, Jim gave Blair a peck on the lips, rolled over and got out of bed. Slipping into a pair of boxers, he glanced back at his lover and praised the day he gave into his feelings and began an intimate relationship with his Guide. 

Unbeknownst to Blair, the borrowing of Simon's cabin had already been granted and Jim's seduction plan was well underway. 

As he reached the bottom of the stairs, Jim smiled to himself. Picking up the phone and calling Simon, he confirmed his plans were a go. They would drive to the cabin tomorrow, and would see Simon there the following day. 

* * *

As Blair and Jim packed the truck, Jim made sure his little gift to Blair was packed and safe in the inside pocket of the coat he was wearing. 

The drive to the cabin was done in comfortable silence. Jim drove as Blair worked on a paper on his laptop. 

"We're almost there, Blair. Let's pull into that little market to pick up the rest of the groceries we'll need." 

"Sure. That way, we won't have to leave the cabin at all," replied Blair with a gleam in his eye. 

The seven hour trip finally came to a close as they reached the back-woods cabin, and began the chore of unpacking. 

"You put away the food, and I'm gonna get the rest of the equipment from the truck and put it on the back porch," Jim suggested while nibbling on Blair's right ear. 

Walking back into the kitchen area of the cabin after depositing the fishing gear on the back deck, Jim asked, "What's for dinner?" They'd decided to forego lunch on the road, instead just snacking on the coffee and power bars they had packed. 

"It's going on four, so I thought we'd just do some soup and sandwiches for dinner. Okay with that?" 

"Sure. Then we can call it an early night, and we'll get up at dawn to hit the lake." 

"Daaawnnn?" whined Blair. 

"Of course, there's always _other_ things we could be doing at dawn," suggested Jim. 

"Yeah, like sleeping!" 

"I had something else in mind." 

Jim closed the distance between he and Blair, and took Blair's mouth with his own. 

"You know, it's a good thing dinner hasn't been started yet," stated Blair as the two lovers broke for air. 

Jim continued to kiss and suck on Blair's mouth and lips. Hands began to caress and unfasten buttons. They were naked soon, and as they lay on the floor in front of the blazing fireplace, they made love. It was slow and sweet. Not the frantic sex that was needed sometimes between the two of them; when the day had proved to be dangerous. When one of them was injured. When one of them had been in jeopardy. 

Two hours later, they were still lying in each others' arms. Fully satisfied, they watched the fire and drank one of the bottles of wine Blair had packed. Jim reached over to his jacket that was on the chair behind Blair, and produced a small box. 

Handing the box to Blair, "I wanted to ask you something, and I was waiting for the right moment. I think this is it. Go on, open it" 

Cautiously, Blair opened the box to discover two identical platinum rings. "Oh, my god." He stared into Jim's eyes, unsure of what to do next. 

"Will you marry me." 

Blair dislodged himself from Jim's embrace, stood and began dressing. 

"Blair? What's wrong?" asked a confused Jim. 

Fully dressed, Blair turned to look at Jim, "I need to go for a walk. I'll be back soon. I love you." 

As Blair exited the front door to the cabin, Jim sat on the blankets wondering what had happened. 

* * *

Blair needed time to think. He never dreamed that he would be proposed to. He never dreamed that he would be getting married. He certainly never dreamed that it would be Jim asking him. Being the son of the flower child like Naomi Sandburg, Blair was always a free spirit. He'd never stayed in one place as long as he had in Cascade. This `getting married' thing would, most certainly, put more roots down than he'd had his entire life. Was he ready for that? Was that permanence something he wanted? 

He'd walked for about 45 minutes before he actually came back to himself. The wanderings of his walk had brought him to a spot he'd not been before. Realizing that he had absolutely no idea where he was, he turned around and started back the way he came. 

Unfortunately, it was pitch black out by this time. The small flashlight he'd been using only illuminated a small area, and he tripped. Falling, none too gracefully, he felt his left leg grabbed viciously. 

"Aaghhh!" 

Turning over, he grasped at his entrapped limb, attempting to free it from its captor. Luckily there were no teeth on the vice around his leg, but the two lips of the claw were well embedded into his calf. He could feel the breaks in the bones as his fingers endeavored to get a grip on the metal. The iron, already slick from his blood, revealed there was no way to grasp it. 

The initial adrenaline from the wound faded, and Blair fell unconscious from pain. 

~ ~ ` ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Back in the cabin, Jim stood on the back porch, still wondering why Blair left like he did. Suddenly a scream cut through the night startling him from his thoughts. Cocking his head to attempt to find his Guide by the heartbeat he knew so well, only produced a deep zone. 

As the night progressed, the rain, as predicted by the weather station, began to fall. Still deep in a zone, Jim stood, insensible to the elements and the plight of his Guide. 

Simon arrived just after noon the following day and opened the front door to find the living area vacant, but the back door open. Strolling through, he made noises as he walked, wanting to make sure he didn't barge in on anything they may have been involved in. 

"Jim? Blair?" 

Reaching the rear of the cabin, Simon saw Jim unmoving and dripping wet from the rain that had only recently ceased, leaning against one of the roof support beams. 

"Oh, god." 

Remembering what Blair had taught him about Jim's zones, Simon began talking Jim back from where he had gone. It had taken close to thirty minutes, but eventually Jim returned. 

Blinking his eyes to clear his vision, Jim swayed and Simon led him to the Adirondack chair against the outside wall of the cabin. 

"What happened?" 

"I don't know. I found you in a zone. I'm glad that Sandburg made me listen to his spiel about bringing you out. It really worked. By the way, where is Sandburg?" 

"He's not here?" 

"If he were, do you think you would have needed me?" 

"What time is it?" 

"It's 12:45. Why?" 

"Saturday?" 

"That's the day that normally comes after Friday, Jim." 

"He's not back yet?" 

"Back from where?" 

"He went for a walk last night. He wouldn't have stayed out all night unless..." 

"Look, Jim. Let's not jump to any conclusions here. Sandburg's a big boy. He can take care of himself." 

"Right. The guy's a human trouble magnet. Something's wrong!" 

Jim leapt from the chair and made to jump off the porch to go in search of his missing lover. Simon held him back. 

"Jim, you need to get some dry clothes on, and some food into you if you want to help Blair." 

Unhappy about the delay, but knowing that it was necessary if he were to find his Guide, he agreed with Simon. Frantically , Jim changed his clothes and grabbed a power bar and a bottle of sport drink from the kitchen. Gathering additional food, he stuffed everything into a backpack. Finished, he looked at Simon, they nodded, and began their search for their missing friend. 

* * *

Blair slowly opened his eyes to the brightness of the midday sunrays streaming through the branches above him. Remembering where he was, he attempted to sit up and dislodge the trap again. Weak from no food or water for many hours, and cold from his sodden clothing, he was again unable to open the trap. 

Shock had set in, and Blair was struggling to remain focused on the task at hand. Realizing the only way he would be rescued was to alert his Sentinel, Blair began to shout. 

**"JIM! HELP!"**

* * *

"Come on, Jim. Use your senses!" insisted Simon after two hours of searching. 

"I can't." 

"What?" 

"They're gone." 

"Excuse me?" 

"They're offline or something. Right now, they're as normal as yours are." 

"Oh, man. Just when we could really use them." 

"Yeah. Sometimes this Sentinel stuff sucks. The one fucking time I really need my senses to find Blair, and they've gone AWOL." 

"Look. Let's just keep going. Maybe we'll get lucky and find some clue as to where he's gone." 

Simon and Jim continued on for the next several hours. 

"We have to go back to the cabin, Jim. Maybe he's already there wondering where we are." 

"You think?" 

"If not, we'll get an early start in the morning. We can't keep looking for him now; it's dark and we're gonna get lost ourselves out here." 

As the day drew to an end, and their search proved to be fruitless, the two decided to regroup and call for a helicopter to fly in the next morning. 

Scared more than ever that his Blair was injured, or worse, Jim stood again on the porch surveying the forest in front of him for anything that would give him a sense of the direction that Blair went in. 

"I'm scared, Simon. Blair only had a flashlight and a light jacket. He wasn't dressed for this type of weather." 

"Sandburg's a tough kid. He knows how to keep himself warm and how to get out of the weather. He's probably sitting pretty in a cave, in front of a fire, writing in that journal he carries around with him." 

"I hope so, Simon. God, I hope so." 

* * *

As the moon rose, Blair's condition continued to weaken. He'd been incoherent and hallucinating for the past several hours. Feverish from infection caused by the rusty trap, he wondered why the love of his life didn't come after him. Blair's delirious mind cast aside the memory of Jim saying he wanted to marry him and instead brought forth memories of times when they hadn't been happy times; times when Jim had wanted nothing more than Blair out of his life. `Why would he bring me up here if he doesn't want me with him? `Why hasn't he come after me?' `Where did this trap come from?' `And why are there pink elephants on parade in Washington?' 

* * *

The next morning dawned with a light dusting of snow on the ground. 

"Shit! I hope you're right about him being in a cave in front of a fire, Simon. I don't want to think about the alternative right now." 

Simon concluded his call to the local state police station. 

"The helicopter is on it's way, Jim. It'll take about ninety minutes to get here, and will start a search once it's in the area for any sign of Sandburg." 

"Let's get going, Simon. I've packed some dry clothes for Blair." 

* * *

`Oh, god, I'm cold,' thought Blair, as he scrounged for additional twigs in an attempt to keep the small fire burning to stave-off frostbite. Have to stay warm. Leg still numb, though. That was bitter-sweet thought. He wasn't feeling the pain any longer, but he knew that the fact that there wasn't any feeling, wasn't a good thing. He hoped against hope that when the sun began to warm the air, it would be enough to warm him too. 

He had screamed himself hoarse. There was very little sound coming from his vocal cords, but every few minutes he would yell as loud as he could for help, hoping that someone - anyone -- would hear him. Please, someone, hear me! 

He struggled to maintain consciousness when it was much easier to slip into the darkness that continued to edge his sluggish brain. Stoking the fire with whatever he could reach, he brought the smoldering embers back to life again. Trying to keep himself busy, he pulled the small journal from the pocket of his jean jacket, and began to write. The thoughts were just jumbled ideas; not keeping to any clear subject. Fleeting, disconnected, brief thoughts that seemed important at the time. 

The sun did rise, and began to warm the air and ground. With that warmth, Blair's body began to warm too; and with that warmth, his leg began to throb. The blood began to flow again, and with it came pain. 

Blair renewed his efforts to try to release himself from the trap. Gasping from pain and dizzy from blood loss, his efforts proved fruitless once more, so he resigned himself to the fact that he was sure he wouldn't make it through the day. The journal then became his last testament. 

* * *

Jim and Simon started out early in the day. Three hours later, they still hadn't found any trace of Blair. They split up and started searching in separate directions in order to cover more ground. 

Finally, Jim knelt, placed his hands, palms-up, on his thighs, and tilted his head back, "Incacha... please. Please help me." 

Jim opened his eyes to see Incacha standing over him. "Please, Incacha, help me find Blair." 

"He is lost to you?" 

"He wandered off into the woods, and hasn't returned." 

"Why would he leave you?" 

"He hasn't left me! Has he?" 

"I cannot hear the heartbeat of your beloved here in the spirit world. He is still with you. But the winds tell me he is badly injured. Go to him." 

"Where is he!" 

"You need only listen to your heart to find your hearts' love." 

Moments later, Jim opened his eyes. Immediately realizing that his senses were back on line, he used the radio to contact Simon to let him know, and to rendezvous near a specific tree that was a central point to each of their locations. 

Zeroing in on his lover's rapid and irregular heartbeat, Jim and Simon made short work of finding their wayward friend. Gasping at the sight that beheld them upon their arrival, Jim dropped to his knees, while Simon contacted the helicopter to divulge their location. 

Jim began ministrations in an attempt to warm Blair, grabbing anything he could to bring the fire back to life. Simon knelt down and grabbed the trap to open it. 

"NO! Don't! It's keeping the wound from bleeding harder at this point. Look at the amount of blood on the ground. It looks like he's close to bleeding out. We need to get him warm." 

"Is he breathing?" asked Simon worriedly. 

"Barely." 

"Make sure he stays that way until the helicopter arrives," commanded Simon 

"How long?" 

"Twenty minutes." 

"I don't think he has that long." 

At that moment, Jim's head snapped towards Blair. 

"What?" 

"He stopped breathing!" 

Tilting Blair's head back, Jim placed his mouth over Blair's to begin mouth to mouth. At the moment their lips met, there was a spark. 

"What the hell was that?" 

"I don't know. But he's breathing again." 

"Keep him that way, damnit." 

"That's what I have in mind." 

Blair stirred, opened his eyes, and they locked onto Jim's momentarily. Then his eyes closed, and he was again unconscious. 

The twenty minutes until the copter arrived was an eternity to Jim. Blair stopped breathing three more times, and again, all it took was the touch of their lips to spark him into breathing again. 

When the paramedics removed Blair from Jim's arms, Blair began to convulse. As soon as he was nestled back in Jim's arms, the convulsions ceased. 

"All right, it seems that you need to keep in contact with Mr. Sandburg," summarized Ben, the paramedic. "We'll work around you." 

Ben began the arduous task of placing several IVs into Blair to replace fluids as quickly as possible. Not an easy task since his veins had nearly collapsed from dehydration and blood loss. Blair's leg was then wrapped with the trap still intact. Jim and Ben placed Blair on the gurney that would take them towards their transportation to the nearest trauma center. 

Overtaxing the winch to bring the two of them up into the helicopter together, Ben sent them up first. Once secured, Ben was brought on board, and the helicopter took off towards Park Memorial Hospital. 

Simon made it back to his car as fast as he could, and began his journey toward the medical center. 

* * *

As soon as the helicopter landed, they were inundated with medical staff. Jim supplied what little information he could as to the circumstances surrounding the accident. Angry as he was at the fact that a trap was out there to be stumbled upon, he needed to rein in that rage until another time and place. 

Jim watched from a corner of the room as so much was being done to save the life of his lover. Thoughts of `feeling sorry for himself' kept creeping into his mind, but he'd shake them off before they took root. Eventually one of the doctors came over to talk to him, and he needed to focus on Blair and what the physician was telling him. 

"Look, Mr. Ellison..." 

"Detective Ellison. Just call me Jim." 

"Jim, Mr. Sandburg is in extremely critical condition." The physician was escorting Jim out of the emergency area that had been Blair's home while he was being assessed. "It's taken us two hours to stabilize your friend. Since he was still having problem breathing, we felt that intubating him was for the best. Medication has also been given to lessen the possibility of additional seizures. 

"We've already infused two units of blood. His lungs are compromised from his drowning incident last year, so we've already started a strong regime of antibiotics to hopefully stave-off pneumonia. 

"He's being taken to the operating room as we speak. He'll be there for the next several hours, at least. Two of the top orthopedic surgeons in the state are here to hopefully save your partner's leg. I'll make sure that you're kept informed of his condition." 

"Thank you, doctor." 

* * *

Jim exited the back area of the emergency department, dazed and trying to make sense of all the information that had just been given to him. Simon arrived as he paced, continuing to keep track of his partner's heartbeat. 

"They took him to the OR," stated Jim simply. 

"Come on," Simon said forty-five minutes later. "I can't stand to watch you pace any longer. Let's get some coffee. The cafeteria is two floors down according to the front desk." 

Following Simon on instinct, Jim entered the elevator. The doors closed and Simon pushed the button for the lower level. Almost immediately Jim began beating on the doors. 

"Get me out." 

"What?" 

"Get me the fuck out of here!" 

"Why?" 

"Get these damned doors open!" 

"Jim, what's wrong?" 

"They don't know if they can save his leg. Oh, god, get me out of here!" 

"Jim! Calm down!" 

As Jim continued to try to claw open the doors, Simon grabbed Jim's shoulder, spun him around and decked his friend, and Jim slumped to the floor unconscious. When the doors opened, Simon hit the button to return to the main floor. The elevator rose again, and when the doors opened, the detective was on his captains' shoulders in a fireman's carry. Simon took the first exit he could find and went straight to his car. Dropping Jim in the rear of the vehicle, Simon got behind the wheel and sped the car out of the parking lot. 

"This is Captain Banks of the Cascade PD," began Simon after dialing the hospital on his cell phone, and being connected to the operating room clerk, "I can be reached at 555-0090. You will contact me if anything, and I mean anything, goes wrong with Blair Sandburg. You got that?" 

"Yes, sir," mumbled the shocked unit clerk. 

"Thank you." Then the captain drove to a nearby park. He got out of his car and waited for his friend to awaken. 

Jim wasn't out longer than ten minutes. When he came too, he was angrier than hell at what Simon had done to him and yelled at Simon to get him back to the hospital. 

Simon was smart enough, that when he placed Jim in the rear of the car, he also place handcuffs on him, so Jim was effectually a prisoner. 

"Jim, you have got to calm down. This is not helping Sandburg. Once you've pulled yourself together, I'll take us back to the hospital; but not before." 

Trying to escape his bonds, Jim continued to rant and rave in the rear of the car. Simon backed away again, and allowed Jim to have his tantrum in private, although watching him from a short distance. 

Jim tried for half and hour to extricate himself. Exhausted finally, Jim acquiesced to his friend's level headedness, and realized there was nothing he could do to help Blair at this point. 

"I'm sorry, Simon," Jim stated, as Simon unlocked the cuffs. 

"Look, Jim, you're under a hell of a lot of stress right now. Not knowing where your lover was for so long. Zoning on your own attempt to locate him. Forget it. You're allowed to freak every now and then." 

Silently, they both got into the front seat and returned to the hospital. 

* * *

Sitting in the operating room waiting area was one of the hardest things Jim had ever had to do, as he promised Simon not to listen in on what was occurring with Blair during the surgery. 

The waiting was interminable. Eleven hours later, the surgeons emerged from the operating suite. 

"Jim Ellison?" one of the doctors inquired. 

Jim snapped to his feet and extended his hand in introduction. 

"I'm Dr. Jaskin, head of Vascular Surgery, and this," he indicated his colleague, "is Dr. Tarpe, the head of orthopedic surgery. We were part of the team that performed the surgery on Mr. Sandburg." The first doctor gestured towards the seats, "Please, sit down and let's discuss what occurred." 

"Thank you, doctors. Um, this is Captain Simon Banks." 

Introductions finally out of the way, the doctors got down to business. 

"First, let me say what an extraordinary fighter Mr. Sandburg is. He coded twice on the table. He has been transfused with nine pints of blood so far. But, we were able, we believe, to save his leg. Frankly, the two of us weren't sure we were talented enough to repair the damage that occurred." Relayed Dr. Jaskin. 

Dr. Tarpe continued, "There was massive damage to all of the arteries and veins in the lower leg. Both bones, the tibia and fibula, were crushed. Dr. Jaskin's team was successful in restoring the blood flow. My team was able to use plating to stabilize the bone structures." 

Dr. Jaskin finished, "I don't need to tell you that these next 48 hours will be dangerous for him. If we can stop the infection that has already taken hold, and if the therapy we've already begun to restore the blood flow continues to progress, he has a decent chance at keeping his leg." 

"Oh, thank god. Thank you," sighed Jim. 

Those were the words he hadn't allowed himself, to hope for. He had allowed himself to hope only that Blair would still be alive. To hope for the miracle that he still had his leg was a dream he didn't dare visualize. 

"Can I see him?" 

"He is still in recovery and..." began Dr. Tarpe. 

"I'm his _life_ partner. Please, I need to be with him." 

"Mr. Sandburg actually does better when the two of them are together," assured Simon. 

"Well, it's against hospital..." said Dr. Jaskin. 

"Please." Was Jim's single-worded appeal. 

The two physicians glanced at each other, and quickly agreed to allow Jim to join Blair in recovery. 

* * *

Walking back into the recovery unit, Jim held his breath until he laid eyes on his love. He, of course, had found him by scent and by sound long before seeing him. 

When they turned the corner towards Blair's curtained off area, Jim caught his first glimpse of Blair, and gasped. 

"I understand that there is a lot of equipment right now, but, he really needs it. He is in extremely critical condition still." Dr. Jaskin said reassuringly. 

"I know." 

Taking a seat, the Sentinel tried to find somewhere on his Guide's body that he could touch; he settled for stroking the his partner's lax face. Touching his cheek, fingering the hair he loved. Jim watched the respirator bringing oxygen to Blair's lungs. He looked at all the monitors, knowing what each meant and what the normal readings should be. Jim noticed that Blair's temperature was elevated and his blood pressure was too low. 

Dr. Jaskin noticed that, when Jim touched Blair, the readings began to stabilize. `They really must be connected,' thought the doctor. "It's a good thing you have each other, because these next few weeks are going to test that bond," he said. 

"Why?" 

"Mr. Sandburg's recovery is going to be long and hard. He's going to be in a lot of pain, and physical therapy, once it begins, is going to be really unpleasant for him. He's going to look to you for ways to get around his therapy, and you're going to have to be steadfast in the knowledge that what we are doing, is the best for him." 

"You're wrong. He's never run away from a challenge as long as I've known him." 

"I hope you're right." 

Several hours later, when the monitors showed a continued steady improvement, Blair was transferred to the Intensive Care Unit. After helping the nursing staff to settle Blair, Jim hunkered down for the long haul he knew it would be. 

* * *

Three days later, and Blair was still unconscious. The respirator had been discontinued earlier in the day, replaced only by a nasal canula; Jim was happy he could see the entire face of his Guide again. 

The door to Blair's room opened and Simon stepped in. "Any change?" he asked hopefully. 

"No." 

Jim continued his vigil, sitting and praying. 

The fourth day, Blair's fingers tightened around Jim's. 

"Jim," came the whisper from Blair's dry lips. Blair's eyes slowly opened, then closed again. 

"Blair!" Jim started upon hearing the whispered word. 

But, Blair was again deeply asleep, and did not respond. 

Over the next two days, Blair awoke a total of seven times, mouthed `love you', then closed his eyes again to the outside world. 

Jim talked about everything and anything so Blair would know that he was not alone. He told Blair secrets that he'd never told anyone else about himself. He told Blair over and over about how deep his love was for him. Was Blair acknowledging that declaration by his whispered words of love too? Jim could only hope. 

Until Blair could stay awake, the answer to so many questions would continue to remain unanswered. 

Finally, on the eve of the seventh day of hospitalization, Blair grasped the hand that was in his own. 

"Blair?" 

Blair was definitely attempting to regain consciousness. He attempted several times to open his eyes without success. 

"Come on, baby. Please. Open your eyes." 

Blair breathing rate increased, and there was an audible moan. 

Jim wanted the waking moment to be his and his alone, but he knew that he needed to alert the medical staff. Duty came first, and he pressed the button to alert the nurses' station. 

"Can I help you?" came the disconnected voice over the speaker. 

"I believe that Blair Sandburg is waking up. Please contact Dr. Jaskin or Dr. Tarpe." 

"Thank you. I will contact them." 

The impersonal response grated on Jim's last nerve, and he was about to respond, but Blair's eyes opened at that moment, and he wanted to revel in the first moments alone with his lover. Jim smiled and kissed his Guide's forehead as Blair attempted to respond. 

The door opened, and Dr. Jaskin entered the room. "I understand that our patient has decided rejoin the living." 

"Seems like it." 

"Do you know your name?" questioned the physician as he removed his penlight from his breast pocket and shone it in Blair's left eye. 

"Bl... Blair," was the whispered response. 

"Do you know what happened?" continued the doctor as the light was moved to the right eye. 

"Trap." 

"That's right, baby. It was an animal trap. And I intend to find out who put it there," Jim said hotly. 

Feeling more awake, Blair attempted to sit up; but all he accomplished was an aborted movement that mode him groan aloud. 

"Take it easy, Mr. Sandburg. You've been through a lot." 

"My leg?" panted Blair. 

Using all his strength, which wasn't much, he grasped Jim's shirt, "Please. My leg?" 

"It was saved," smiled Jim. 

"And with a lot of work, I'm hoping you'll regain full use of it." 

"Blair's used to hard work, aren't you, honey?" Jim said fondly. "And I'll be right there as the head of your cheering section." 

"Okay. I'll check in on you again tomorrow Mr. Sandburg. Mr. Ellison." 

The physician exited the room and Jim made himself comfortable on the chair he had pulled up next to the bed. 

"Blair..." Jim squeezed the hand he was holding just a little tighter, his eyes damp with suppressed emotion. "You aren't able to even keep your eyes open, sweetheart. Go back to sleep, I'll be right here, okay?" 

"I know, you're right," mumbled Blair already relaxing into sleep. 

As Blair's eyes closed and remained that way, Jim was grateful for the additional hours' solitude to gather his thoughts about the botched rescue he felt so responsible for. 

* * *

The following morning, Blair awoke feeling much more himself. After a breakfast that consisted of a bagel and fruit, he was treated to a sponge bath by his lover and relished every second of it. 

"Although these drugs keep me feeling a little more fuzzy than I would prefer to be, we need to talk," he said when he was finally clean, dry and settled. 

"I know. Where do you want to start?" Jim asked. 

"Why didn't you come after me?" Tears brimmed in Blair's eyes as he tried to figure out why his Sentinel hadn't searched for him. 

"I'm sorry." 

"What happened?" 

"I went out on the back deck to try to hear you. I guess I gave you about half an hour, and figured you'd be back by then. After listening for a minute, I heard a scream." Tears began to slide down the face of the Sentinel as he began to bared his soul to his Guide. "I zoned searching for your heartbeat." 

"Zoned? Are you okay?" 

"Am I okay? You are fucking amazing, you know that? You almost died!" 

"But I didn't. I'm alive." 

"Simon found me the next day..." Jim continued hesitantly. 

"The next day? How long were you zoned?" 

"I don't know. He said he arrived somewhere after noon. It scared the crap outta' him. He said he was glad you made him listen to all the lectures on how to pull me from a zone. There I was standing on the back porch, dripping wet, and totally zoned. Apparently, it took a while for him to break through. 

"We started searching. We hunted for you until it was dark. Simon had to drag me back to the cabin. He called the local police and they sent out a chopper to explore the back side of the mountain the next day." 

"What about your senses? 

"They were totally off-line." 

"What!?" Blair exclaimed, his voice shocked 

"I had nothing. Everything was numb. I was totally _fucking_ useless!" 

"Who finally found me?" 

"Simon and I ultimately split up to cover more area. I knew I had to do something drastic. I knelt down and call on Incacha." 

"Incacha? Incacha helped?" 

"I plead with Incacha for help, and my senses returned. Within a minute, I could hear your heartbeat and breathing... God! They were so slow. I didn't think we'd get to you in time. Then, when we did, and I saw you... Fuck!" 

Jim stood and paced in an attempt to regain control of his emotions. 

"You stopped breathing, and I started CPR. As soon as our lips touched, there was an actual spark and you began breathing again. That happened twice until we, Simon and I, realized you and I needed to stay in contact with each other. You had a seizure at one point, and that convinced the EMT of the same thing. 

"When we finally got you here, it took them a long time to get you stabilized. Then you were off to the OR. There you apparently coded several more times." 

"Babe, I am so sorry you had to go through that. It was my fault," Blair said softly 

"Why did you leave?" 

"I couldn't believe you asked me to marry you. I have never stayed in the same place for this long. And the thought of marrying you just threw me. I never thought that dream would ever come true. It was an aspiration I wouldn't allow myself to even think about. And there you were, on your knees, asking me. That moment was so beautiful. I love how sensitive and caring you are when we make love, but I've never been good at making commitments before. The possibility of me fucking this up is so high, that I got scared. But, I still wanted to remember that moment when you asked me to marry you, forever. 

"I just feel that I'll never live up to that. So many things have gone wrong in my life, that the possibility of fucking this up is so high that I didn't want that memory tainted by anything. I want to remember that moment forever." 

"So you ran out on me? On us?" 

"No." 

"Then, what?" 

"I ran out on me." 

"What?" 

"I want to marry you so much. But I don't want to break your heart." 

"You could never break my heart. You chipped it a bit by running out though," Jim replied attempting to alleviate some of the tension with the levity and a smirk. 

"See! I'm no good in a long-term relationship. I was never taught how, not with Naomi as a role model. She was never with anyone longer than a couple of years. We've run that course already, and I'm always waiting for that other shoe to drop." 

"Baby, I don't intend for that shoe to _ever_ drop. This bond that we share is deeper than the Sentinel/Guide bond; and you know it. Every time I kiss you, the fireworks still go off. The times that we make love are held in my heart as the most precious moments in my life. I intend to be with you until I draw my last breath. I plan on waking up next to you every day until I die. And my proposal was also a promise. To strive to make you happy, laugh, and enjoy every day with me as much as I do with you." 

Blair continued on as the tears finally welled over and trickled down his cheeks, "I hope I can be as positive about our future as you. I'm sorry, that I left." 

"I just wish you had shared these feelings with me," Jim said quietly. 

"I don't think I was ready to admit the thoughts to myself, let alone voice them to you. I guess I never expected to have this kind of point of view. I always expected this Sentinel/Guide bond that we share to continue, but I never expected the love to be there too. And if love entered into the equation, I by no means anticipated the longevity of that part of the relationship. Am I making any sense?" 

"I think so. You were always on the move and you expected to continue that nomadic lifestyle. Then I came into the picture." 

"Yeah. Please, don't doubt my love for you; ever," Blair said earnestly. 

"I won't." 

Jim and Blair kissed to seal the promise. 

"Look. You can hardly keep your eyes open. You sleep. I'll be here." 

"You won't leave?" 

"No, baby. I'll be at your side, always." 

Smiling, Blair mouthed "I love you," and closed his eyes. 

* * *

Several mornings later, when Blair awoke, Jim was nowhere to be found. Although not concerned, the patient was disappointed. Depression had been setting in slowly as his recovery progressed. 

Eventually, the bathroom door opened and Jim entered the room. Dressed in a tux, he opened the main door to Blair's room and in walked Simon, and the whole of Major Crimes. Behind them, Naomi entered, smiling. The final person to enter was unknown to him. 

"What's going on, Jim?" 

Kneeling next to the bed holding his partner close, Jim asked, "Will you marry me? Today?" 

"Now?" came the confused reply. 

"Yes. Now." 

"But, I look..." 

"You look beautiful." 

"Really?" 

"Yes, really." 

"Yes." 

"Yes?" 

"Yes. I will marry you. Today. Now." 

The smile that erupted on Blair's face was brilliant enough to light up the city for a year. 

"Hello," spoke the minister. "I'm Rev. Michael O'Neill. If you'll allow me, I'd love to marry the two of you. I've spoken at length with James, and believe the strength of the love between you should be something cherished and shared every day of your lives." 

"What can I say, except... yes." 

"All right. James, please stand next to Blair." 

"Can I sit next to him?" 

"I think that under these circumstances, that would be perfect." 

After Blair was carefully maneuvered over a few inches to make room for his beloved, the friends and family that came to witness the union, gathered around. 

"Friends. We are gathered here to witness the commitment of two very special people. I have come to know of the love these two have for each other through their extended family. James..." 

Turning to gaze into the dark blue eyes of his partner, Jim began speaking of his love. 

"Blair. I can't think of anyone I'd rather spend the rest of my life with. You have kept me sane since the day we met. I want to live every day with you in it. I want to wake to see your face. And I want to close my eyes with you being the last thing I see. I will strive to make you happy, to keep you safe, to love and honor you for the rest of my days." 

Tears were leaking from Jim's eyes as he finished his promise. 

Then it was Blair's turn. 

"Blair?" 

"James. I have never loved anyone as much as you. I wasn't aware there was a love as deep as what I feel for you. You are the air that I breathe, and the sunshine that warms me. I want you in my life for eternity. I want to wake with your arms around me, and fall asleep with your breath on my neck. I promise to love and respect you and keep you safe from harm until forever." 

"May I have the rings?" 

Jim smiled at Simon, who produced the rings from his pocket, and placed them in the minister's hand. 

"These rings have no beginning and no end. The way love has no beginning and no end. Please, James, place Blair's ring on his finger." 

Jim picked up the ring and placed it on Blair's finger. 

"Blair, please place James' ring." 

Blair picked up the ring and kissed it. Placing on Jim's finger, he then kissed it again, all without removing his gaze from the eyes of his beloved. 

"There is a passion that flows from people that have been destined to be together. The passion surrounding the souls of these people is the strongest and most vibrant I have ever seen. The love between these two people will be well served." 

"I have seen the aura of James and Blair together, and have to agree with you Michael. The coloring is amazing," chimed in Naomi. 

"James and Blair, you have committed yourselves to each other in the eyes of your family. Please, seal your commitment." 

Blair and Jim seemed to have eyes only for each other during the entire ceremony. The other people in the room didn't seem to exist, as if they were in a world entirely of their own making. 

As the kiss to end all kisses ended, applause broke out that seemed to finally draw their attention to those that were there to congratulate them. 

Smiling, the newly married couple accepted the well-wishes of those in attendance. But, Jim realized Blair had just about used up all the energy he had regained over the last two days. Standing, he helped Blair to get settled in bed, then turned to his witnesses. 

"I hate to get married and then ask you all to leave, but, I need to ask you all to leave." 

"Jim, no," replied Blair, as his eyes began losing their battle to remain open. 

"Blair. James is right. We'll see you tomorrow." 

"Jim, I never thought I'd say this to you but, you've got one hell of a guy there." 

"Thank you, Joel." 

"Thank you, everyone for com..." Blair was fast asleep before finishing the sentence. 

"Thank you again, Simon," continued Jim as he escorted everyone out of his spouse's room. "This never would have been able to happen without you." 

"You just continue to take care of Blair." 

"That's something I intend to do for the rest of time." 

* * *

"It's only been two weeks since the surgery, are you sure he's strong enough to be released?" 

"Well, we've removed the Blair's leg from traction, and it just has the pins in it right now. He needs to return every other day for adjustments and therapy, but I think he'll do fine at home," replied Dr. Jaskin. 

"Jim, please. I need to get out of this room." 

"We've made arrangements for all the necessary equipment to be delivered to your apartment tomorrow morning, and a transport ambulance will take Blair tomorrow at noon. All the arrangements have been made.' 

"You went behind my back and planned all of this?" 

"Yeah. I have to get out of these four walls, man." 

"All right." 

Blair knew that anything he asked for would be granted. His Sentinel couldn't refuse his Guide anything at the present time. 

"Good. I'll see you first thing tomorrow to discharge you, and make sure that you and Jim know how to care for your wound." 

"Thanks again, Doc." Stated Jim as he shook the surgeon's hand. 

"My pleasure," responded the physician as he exited the room. 

"I can't believe you did that! Going behind my back and planning all of it." 

"I need to be with you," Blair stated simply as a shy smile began to spread across his face. "We've been married now for a week, and have yet to consummate it!" 

"I hate to break it to you, baby, but there it's gonna be a long time before we can consummate our marriage." 

"Yes, I agree; to a point. It will be a long time before we can _fully_ consummate our marriage, but there are a lot of other things that I can be doing to show my love for you." 

"Blair, you show your love for me by just waking up in the morning." 

"What?" 

"I thought I'd lost you forever up on that fucking mountain. And you, being here, proves that you held on for me. And so does this." 

Jim reached into his pocket and produced a small notebook. With trembling hands, he held it out for Blair to take. 

"What is this?" questioned Blair as he took the pages and studied Jim's face. 

"It's the notebook that you had with you when you left the cabin." Jim stood and walked towards the door. 

"Where are you going?" 

"I'm going to let you have a few minutes." 

Noticing the notebook was not in the best of shape, Blair began to open the rumpled pages. Finding the first legible page, he began to read: 

Of course I love you Jim. There is no doubt in my heart, that I want to spend the rest of eternity by your side. My mind hasn't caught up with the idea yet. 

The day I found you, you were the `holy grail' I had been searching for to complete my thesis. You were in need of information, and I was the one able to pass on what little I knew. Eventually, things became easier as time went on. I know that I was not, and still am not, the easiest person to be around when I something piques my interest. I have tried to make your life with your senses easier. Hopefully, you will be able to continue to grow in your abilities. 

Then we became friends. 

As friends, you showed me what it is to be brave and honorable. The instincts that have been part of your life, are now ingrained in mine. And I will always thank you for that. I had no idea that our lives would become so intermingled that, at this point in my life, I don't know where I stop and you begin. 

Then we became lovers. 

As lovers, you showed me what it is to love. I have loved, but I have never been in love with anyone before. I never thought I'd settle down long enough in one place to be `in love' with anyone. You have shown me what true friends and lovers do for one another. I would happily trade my life to save yours. The time that we have had together, the happiness that we've shared, I will take that with me today as I die, and it will last me all of eternity. 

I want you to move on, Jim. Grieve for me, but please, please don't let my death destroy you. Know that I am able to die happy. Know that I will never leave you in spirit. I will always be your Guide. And I will always protect you. 

All my love, from now until eternity.  
Blair 

As Blair finished reading what he had obviously written, tears were streaming down his cheeks. Not remembering writing the testament made him a bit uneasy. Hoping he hadn't written anything too specific about Jim's senses was a worry. Although, seeing that the rest of the pages were badly blotched, due to the rain and snow that had fallen during the time he was trapped, gave him hope that even if someone else had rescued him first, there was no chance any `classified' information would have been leaked. 

Eventually, Blair was able to bring his tenuous emotions under control. Jim chose that moment to stroll back into the hospital room. 

"Where did you find this?" 

"Simon found it next to you and picked it up." 

"Did he read it?" 

"I don't think he would betray you like that." 

"I don't remember writing this." 

"You were pretty out of it when we found you. You were so close to dying, that..." 

Unable to finish the sentence, Jim turned away from his mate and went to the window. 

"I didn't die, Jim. I'm right here." 

"I'm not sure I want to keep this up." 

"What? Us? We just got married!" 

"Not us! The department." 

"Why?" 

"Because every day we put our lives on the line. Every day, we go out into the streets. Every day, we go into situations that we might not come out of alive. I can't live with that any longer." 

"Jim. Jim, look at me." 

Jim turned from his gazing through the window to look his life partner in the eye. He knew that Blair was right. Blair, the one with the unlimited number of lives would always be by his side. 

And, one more thing he knew... that he'd always be by Blair's side. Especially now, during Blair's recuperation. He knew that once Blair was more recovered and the physical therapy started, that Blair would need him even more. Need him to encourage him to follow the therapy regimen. Need him to be strong when Blair wanted to curl up in a corner because of the pain. Need him to be a strong shoulder to cry on when the pain of the therapy threatened to overcome Blair. 

"What are you looking at, Jim?" 

"You. Just wondering something. Are you ever wrong?" 

"Not when it comes to you." 

The End. For now! 

* * *

End Marry Me by blairbear: purple.1@verizon.net  
Author and story notes above.

  
Disclaimer: _The Sentinel_ is owned etc. by Pet Fly, Inc. These pages and the stories on them are not meant to infringe on, nor are they endorsed by, Pet Fly, Inc. and Paramount. 


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